idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
