We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
