the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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