Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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