I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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