guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
