Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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