but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize