Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
