we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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