If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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