i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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