There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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