did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
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