Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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