I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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