I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
