im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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