he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
