is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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