just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
