I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
handjob tips. give me some.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize