Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
