I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
No subtext here. People are naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
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