and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
