so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
