Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
