I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
