I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
