No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Randomize
