My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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