fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
