but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize