i can't believe i had my finger in that
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
