dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
