can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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