the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
