How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
