My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Randomize