return my video game
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Randomize
