Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
