My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
did you just send me my own nude
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
how drunk are you?
Several
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
