I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
