That's when you crack a 10am beer
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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