It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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