what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
