then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
