IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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