Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
