Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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