Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
the liver wants what the liver wants
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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